Your dad is funny. When he talks to you, he uses a really deep “talking to Grace” voice, because he knows you like low bass sounds. We were in a conference room the other day where I was giving a presentation. There was some lovely old classic jazz music playing next door and you kicked away! In church, you looooove the bass. It’s not jerking kicks like you’re startled; more like swimming and dancing in my belly. Those low vibrations get you moving!
7 weeks. Crazy. I can’t believe you will be here so soon! OK, it’s starting to sink in. Waddling around is getting funnier. Sitting up is near impossible on my own, so I roll out of bed instead. Sleeping is more like taking lots of little naps. My maternity clothes don’t fit anymore. Time to go up a size or keep borrowing your dad’s t-shirts : ) And most of all, I’m having lots and lots of Braxton Hicks contractions… sometimes so many I get worried you are coming early. The other night I had what felt like a real contraction. It was so painful I almost passed out (and I was already laying in bed!). Thankfully, your dad was there to help me breathe through it and it went away. So, I’m trying to take it easy now. Which isn’t that easy considering all the activity around here.
We just sent the magazine off to the printer yesterday and started going through proofs today. Someday, I’ll tell you all about the magazine and what this journey has been like. This last issue has been a miracle. Mostly thanks to you, little one. Having you in my belly has caused me to slow down and commit even more to what is most important to me. I hope to teach you about boundaries, priorities, commitment and the joy of making mistakes someday when you are older. Focusing on what matters most teaches me every day to always look to the simple path that God has laid out for us to follow. Life is so much easier that way!
When we were creating the first three issues, I had so many moments where I just wanted to just give up. It was stressful. There were sleepless nights. There were many many meltdowns. Not this time. At all. Yes, there were stressful times and it wasn’t all easy, but allowing God to work more in my life has changed everything. I only worked late once and only because you were kicking so much I couldn’t sleep anyway : ) I never worked a Sunday. I always stopped working when your dad came home. I ignored my cell phone. For the most part, I felt calm. Peaceful. And here I am, the day after we sent files, with only 3 flagged messages in my inbox. This has truly been a miracle. A life change. I have a lot of dear friends to thank for helping me focus (Em, I love you so much) and be still during this time and it just makes me want to say Thank you, Jesus! all day long (and sometimes I do repeat that to myself over an over). Times have changed little one and I’m so grateful. God is truly so good.
I start maternity leave in one week, on October 1st. I planned to have some time before you came so I can best prepare for you. There’s a lot to prepare. I’m excited and scared and some days this feels very surreal. Mostly, though… I’m grateful.
The only thing that makes me excited to not have you in my belly anymore soon is getting to hug your dad a little closer. You are like the balloon they put between middle schoolers at dances right now. Someday, you’ll know what that means. I turn to the side so we don’t squish you right now : ) I can’t wait to be holding you and have a family hug very soon.
P.S. Your Aunt Nancy is so wonderful. She came over again yesterday and just can’t believe how big you are getting! The images she is taking are so special. I can’t wait for her to capture your first cry when you arrive and your first yawn and soon enough, that first smile. Soon, little one. Very soon.
